Questions people ask when they find out you do Lemons

“How fast do you go?”


: Erm, well, I don’t really know. There’s no speedo. Maybe a hundred and ten at the end of the straight?
Them: My brother did a hundred and thirty?between Dead Squaw, Arizona and Coleslaw, Nevada
You: Uh-huh?

“How long do you each drive for?”



You: The serious teams can put a driver in for?a whole tank of fuel, which is usually about?two hours.
Them: I drove from San Francisco to Los Angeles once without stopping.
You: Mmm.
Them: Also I only used two tanks of fuel the whole way.

“Do you all have to be in the car at once?”


: No. It only has one seat.
Them: But how do you get to the race?
You: I think this is a more involved procedure than you’re imagining.

“Do you wear your costumes when you’re driving?”


: That would be kind of dangerous.

“What do you do if the car breaks down?”


You: It doesn’t.
Them: Really?
You: Sorry, that was a joke. Actually we call AAA.
Them: Really?
You: That was a joke too.

“I love driving. I might get a team together!”


You: Great! Do you love?reading instructions, filling in forms, looking after children, organising other people’s vacations or taking days off work to drive around fire extinguisher companies looking for a metal mounting bracket?
Them: No.
You: You probably won’t like it then.
Them: Then why do you do it?
You: By the time I realised?what it actually involved, I had a car that couldn’t be used for anything else.

5 thoughts on “Questions people ask when they find out you do Lemons”

  1. Them: “Is it like NASCAR?”

    Me: No, it’s road racing.

    Them: “You race on the STREET??!

    Me: No, a road course.

    Them: “So, an oval, then? Like NASCAR?”

    Me: (bangs head against wall)

  2. Them: Do you ever win the race?

    Me: No, its really hard to win. And our car breaks down often- its a cheap car, remember?

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